Believing You’re Too Much or Not Enough

Are you looking for counseling in Greensboro to help with shame, doubt, or self-judgment as a result of grief from believing that you are too much or perhaps, not enough? Maybe you felt as though you had to take care of yourself because those who were responsible for helping you to see your God-given gifts and purpose, betrayed you and/or planted doubt within you.

In a perfect world, everyone would grow up with parents and families that love and support them. Everyone would receive nutritious meals made with love and quality ingredients. Siblings would have spats that would quickly dissipate, and parents would never divorce or fight. Each person would be treated with kindness and respect. And others would be genuinely excited to see you when walked into the room.

Unfortunately, some of us may get some of those things, and many only get a few. And what’s even more devastating is that you were not cherished and delighted in the way God intended for you to be. However, it’s not too late! You may be thinking, “What do you mean it’s not too late – I’m 30 (or 40 or 50) years old! It is too late!” It’s true that you may not have developed a healthy relationship with your parents or gotten your emotional needs met, but as an adult, you can begin to give some of those things to yourself. AND you can choose people who are willing to give them to you.

As children, it’s terrifying to think that your parents aren’t capable of giving you what you need. And the fear intensifies when they lead you to believe that you are too much or not enough in some way. Because children tend to be self-focused, it’s natural that they think the reason they aren’t getting their needs met is because of some flaw within them. It would be too terrible to think about the people that you must depend on for food, clothing, and shelter are unhealthy and unwilling to meet your emotional needs. So, children develop their ways of viewing themselves, others, God, and the world around them based on their experience. You see, children are excellent observers, but they are not always the best interpreters.

You may be grieving even though you don’t realize it because sometimes grief comes from what we hoped to get but didn’t. Whatever the situation was for you, you may have come to believe things that are not true about you. The shame and the lack of self-compassion have left you feeling defeated, and you are realizing that staying the same isn’t going to work for you anymore. You are ready for a change, but you’re not quite sure what to do.

At Breathe Again Counseling, you will be guided to uncover your true beliefs about yourself, others, God, and the world around you. You will be encouraged to know what you value so that you can build a life based on what’s important you. Support through the therapeutic relationship can give you the tools you need to build the life you want. Reach out today through the contact form to see how Breathe Again Counseling may be able to assist you in building a life you love!